White Lines
by Lambbaby
Summary: She needed to put some distance between them. How many white lines would bring her back to him? A BBRae fic.Hope you like it.
1. White Lines

White Lines

A/N: Like most of my one-shots this one just came to me while listening to a song. I've always wanted to write one of those a character leaves, returns and has a romantic reunion fics. So when I heard Alexz Johnson's 'White Lines', I couldn't resist. It was the perfect song and perfect inspiration. I want to include the lyrics but am worried my story will be pulled. However if you can download it I fully recommend listening to it while reading this.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans, the song or even the computer I'm typing on.

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She was coming back. After a year away from home, away from her friends, away from him she was coming back. She was coming home. She hoped that they would be home when she got there. She didn't relish the idea of returning to an empty Tower. She was actually looking forward to a big reunion. My, how she had changed.

She told them she needed a break. Told them that the whole ordeal with the Brotherhood had been too much for her. Told Robin that she just couldn't take another end of the world crisis. She just needed sometime to regroup, to gather herself again. She was falling apart. He told her to take her time. That they all needed to get away sometimes, they all needed to forget. That they all needed to clear their heads from time to time, that her place would be safe while she was away.

She knew he told Cyborg and Star that same story she'd told him. The same story she'd tried to tell Gar. Unfortunately those animal senses of his could sniff out a lie twenty feet away. He wanted the truth. She told him. She needed to get away from him. She needed some space. Needed to put some distance between the two of them and their burgeoning relationship. She needed distance between her heart and her head, since neither seemed to be listening to her anymore. She told him that they were playing with fate, that they were too close to the edge of something big, trying to build something that couldn't last, wouldn't survive. He had smiled at her then. It was a smile that lit up her soul. Told her that if she felt they were moving to fast and she needed space then she should go. Go and make sure she knew what she wanted. He'd still be here when she returned.

She left early in the morning. She didn't want a huge amount of hoop-lah on her last day. Instead she simply grabbed her bags, her bus ticket, and left. No good-byes, no tears, no nothing. Just a swish of her cloak and whoosh of the door, and she was gone.

She chose the bus on purpose. She knew that since the ticket destination was on the other side of the border there'd be many stops in between. Many places to lose her self and to forget what she was leaving. She planned on getting off at a random town and disappearing for as long as it took for her to regain control. Regain control of herself, her emotions, her head, and her heart.

She stayed on the bus for hours. Ignoring the looks of the passengers around who were obviously wondering what in world she was wearing a cape for in this heat. She watched the ground as the bus drove onward. Watched the white lines on the rode as they rolled underneath the tires. She tried counting them for a while, to see how many it took for her to stop missing them. How many it took to stop missing him. She was at 89,624 when she finally could count no more.

She didn't know where she was when she finally got off. Mexico was unfamiliar to her and that made her uncomfortable. As did the seemingly oppressive heat that was bearing down on her. Her first move was changing her clothes. After she found a place to stay that is. She hoped that the dusty little town she was in would at least have a hotel. She wasn't good at getting strangers to trust her and had no other back up plan. She was for once playing it by ear. She was for once completely on her own.

She managed. For a whole year she managed to survive. Learning the language was easy enough, and after that it was a small leap to getting a job. Her apartment was small, quiet, and completely hers. She was doing okay. By day that is. It was at night that she struggled. She dreamed of them. Dreamed of him. She held him when she slept. They took journeys and traveled through space in her dreams. They rode the stars together. She kissed him when she slept. In her dreams the kisses made the stars glow brighter, the sun shined harder. In her dreams she could let go, she could lose control. She could do anything in her dreams.

It was the dreams that drove her back home. The dreams that persuaded her to buy a ticket this time going in the opposite direction of where she was. She once again left without a goodbye. Gathered her sparse belongings and boarded the bus. Let it lead her back home. She watched the ground again; watched the white lines and the headlights that toiled on by. Counted the lines wondering how many it would take to bring her home. She was at 856,973 when the bus finally pulled into Jump City. When the white lines finally brought her back home.

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A/N:This isn't the end. I have at least two more chapters planned. The next on is from Beastboy's pov. I hope you all liked this. And please, if I write the next chapter and find out that multi-part stories aren't my thing, don't kill me for trying something new. 


	2. Walking With the Ghost

Chapter 2 : Walking with the Ghosts

A/N: takes a deep breath: This is chapter two. This is BB's pov. A year is long time for anyone to be alone, and I wanted to show how Raven's departure affected more than just her. So this is BB's take on his year without Raven. How he felt and how he dealt with those feelings.

I dedicate this chapter to all the sweethearts who reviewed chapter one. You guys totally made me feel comfortable about moving forward with this story.Thanks a million. And to dr.evil99, trust me chapter 2 wouldn't be up without his help.

Disclaimer: Don't own the Teen Titans, or anything else. All I own is Biff, my annoyingly idiotic muse and his new friend the angel Raziel. Both of them are stupid and for sale.

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She thought she was being quiet. Thought that no one would notice her flight. But he wasn't called Beast Boy for nothing. He could hear her gathering her things. Even in the deep, coma-like sleep he was in he could smell her. Her gentle scent of jarcanda blossoms and patchouli was moving silently and swiftly down the hall. Moving past the doors that lined the way. Moving past the doors that held her friends. Leaving them behind. He knew she wouldn't stop to say goodbye. It wasn't her style. He knew that she was intent on just fading away for a while. Knew that she wanted to disappear. So even though he felt like his soul was being torn out through his back, he refused to get up and try to stop her. He focused all his energy on holding onto the indigo cloak he'd pirated, rolled over and faced the wall. He stayed there until he heard the door to the Tower whoosh shut. Stayed there until she was gone.

He knew she was running from it. Running from him, from the idea of them being a couple. The idea of them being together, the idea of them caring about one another. Loving each other. Knew that she was just so afraid of what that meant that she did the only thing that felt natural to her. She fled. And he let her. He was no fool, he knew that the tighter he held her the more she'd fight to get away. The closer he tried to get the farther she'd place herself. So he did the only thing he could do. He let her go. He gave the space and the time that she felt she needed and wanted. Told her to go, that he'd still be here when she got back.

He'd seen the bus ticket. She didn't know that, but he had. He'd snuck into her room last night, intent on having a memento of the girl who'd stolen his heart. Knew that although the tickets destination was for Guadalajara, Mexico, the chances of her actually getting off there were slim. Knowing her like he did, he figured she'd get off in some out of the way town just to make sure she was really alone. Just to make sure she had her space.

He knew that the others watched him closely those first couple of weeks. They knew the real reason Raven had fled and they watched him, waiting for him to break down, freak out, anything. He didn't share their worries. He was _fine_, he incessantly reassured them. He didn't need to talk because there was nothing to talk about. He could deal with her leaving it was no big deal. He was okay, really okay.

At least that was the lie he told himself. He was far from fine and he knew it. As the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months he became less and less okay. Her ghosts invaded every place he went. He saw her face in places, like his tofu eggs (which she said tasted like fried glue), or in the strangers on the street (one time that person was on old lady, another she was a he). He'd walk by her door, catch a fading whiff of her jarcanda patchouliscent and freeze; trying to take in a much of the smell as possible. His nights were the worst though. She invaded his dreams, haunted him nightly. She'd stand there arms reaching for him, but each time he'd reach back he'd wake up. Realize that he'd been dreaming. That he was alone.

He hadn't wanted to let her go. He knew that making her stay, forcing her to that she belonged with him, would've been useless. Knew that she had to figure it out for herself. But he wished he'd told her to stay. Wished he'd let her know how much he cared about her. He'd wanted to tell her that it wasn't okay for her to just run off when things got hard, when she felt scared. That running away wouldn't help her. That the more she ran the more she lied to herself. That he was scared too. That he thought it was selfish of her to just leave, to not ask him how _he_ felt about the changes their relationship was facing. That he thought it was selfish of her to just disappear and expect him to still be waiting whenever she decided to return. That she was selfish for not thinking about how all the time apart would affect him. That he cared about her and would be with her every single scary step of the way. But he hadn't. He'd wanted to tell her all that and more but he hadn't. He'd just smiled and let her go. Let her walk away from him.

Ten months to the day he came to a realization. He had to move on. He had to start living, truly living his life again. He could no longer go on acting as if he expected her to just show up suddenly, as if one morning he'd wake up and she'd be there. He could no longer put his life on hold. So he let her go. He came back out of the bubble he'd been in and began to enjoy the world around him. The ghosts and the girl moved to the back of his mind and heart. He was going to be okay.

Two months later the world decided he needed a little bit of a shake-up. Decided that he'd been getting too comfy and needed to be reminded that no problem just disappears like that forever. That no one person just disappears forever. The entire Titans group, reserve members included were at the Tower. They were celebrating the new addition to their team. Robin had decided that four team members just weren't enough to watch the city. Thus the addition of Wondergirl, or Donna as she preferred to be called. It was a blowout that only the Titans were capable of; joyous, loud and vibrant. Which was why the sudden silence was such a shock. Gar knew, instantly that only one person could bring such silence with her. And there she was. Her hair a little longer, body a little leaner and her eyes a little darker. Raven. She was finally home.

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A/N: Okie-dokie so let me know what you guys think so far. I know for sure their will definitely be one more chapter. Maybe two if I feel that these two need more time to get back on track. I'm trying to stay below five chapters. Anyway please leave me reviews, they make me feel so much better and so very happy. 


	3. Choux Pastry Heart

Choux Pastry Heart

A/N: So this is the third and sadly final chapter of 'White Lines". The proverbial ball is back in Raven's court for this one. I apologize for the wait but this chapter really gave me a hard time On this plus side this is the first time any of my stories have included dialogue.(even if it is a monologue.) Nothing seemed to fit the overall theme if the story. It took a lot of work. And I'm still not completely satisfied.

Disclaimer: I own no part of the TT organization. Wish I could at least own a little piece if Kid Flash though. Nor do I own the title of this chapter. It's from a song by Corrine Bailey Rae.

Dedication: This final chapter is a belated birthday gift. Kay, this was the only thing I could think of to give you (relatively) in time. I did consider cookies, candy, someones kneecaps and a fallen angel but alas, they simply were out of my budget range. Happy (very belated) birthday girl. I hope you like this.

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She wasn't supposed to be this nervous. Wasn't supposed to feel so intimidated. She was Raven. Raven, the mistress of all that was dark and mysterious. She was part demon for Azar's sake. She could do this. She was going to be fine.

He'd been cordial. As soon as he was able to get his eyes under control he had led the rest of the group in welcoming her back. He had even hugged her, albeit briefly. In fact there had been hugs all around (which earned her quite a few stares as Raven did not hug, as a general rule). She had been introduced to her new team member, Donna, who rushed to ensure her that she _was not_ her replacement. Raven had even joined in the festivities, telling those around her the bare bones about her year in reclusion. All seemed to be well.

Then she'd decided to go to her room. Go back to the place she'dfled fromso many nights ago. She never made it past the door. She stood in the hallway staring at her name in its plaque. She noticed the fine layer of dust, a sure sign that no one had dared enter her sanctum in her absent. But more importantly she noticed the fingertips over her name. She knew, instinctively, whom they belonged to. He'd been polite to her all evening. Nothing more. Nothing less. To everyone else he'd appeared to be fine. She knew better. Knew that her sudden re-appearance had essentially sucker-punched him. She was still reeling from the dizzying rush of emotions she's felt from him. Shock, joy, anger and confusion had washed over him the moment he saw her. They'd shaken _her_ with their intensity.

She was tempted to wait. Tempted to put off their inevitable confrontation till the next morning. At least tomorrow she'd be clean and out of the civilian clothes she wore. She may not have all the answers either of them needed but she'd be in her real clothes. She'd have her armor; her protection from what she knew was coming. But she knew that she needed to do this now. Knew that the longer she waited the worse things would get. Besides she hadn't hidden out in the desert for a year; trying to get to this point only to back down now. She was too far in to turn back.

She followed his emotions. She let his anger and his confusion lead her past his empty room, past the still noisy common room and out of the Tower. They were so strong she could taste them. Slightly sweet, sour and tangy all it once. It led her to the rocks surrounding the Tower. With his back hunched and his head down; he looked incredibly small and undeniably broken. She recalled other times she'd seen him at these rocks. Each sojourn to them meant he was hurting and upset. It tore her apart to know that this time she'd been the one to send him here.

She knew he was aware of her. His sharp senses had probably caught her scent the moment she'd left the building. She fondly remembered a time when he'd told her that her scent was the most comforting smell in the world to him. Told her it was a balm to his usually beleaguered nerves. Fleetingly she wondered if those words still held true for him.

Squaring her shoulders she continued to approach him, trying desperately to find the right words to begin with. She hadn't moved more than two feet when his voice stopped her. "I waited for you. For a whole year I put my life on hold." It's funny how a single sentence can stagger a person. In an instant all her thoughts, all her explanations, left her. What could she say? How could anything she said ease the pain she felt rolling off him? She parted her lips to respond but again he beat her to it. "Did you think about me? I thought about you. Saw your face wherever I went. You haunted me, you know? Did you consider my feelings when you left? Did you wonder how I must've felt when you decided to just up and go? Did you think that maybe I'd be hurt when you ran away in the early morning not even saying goodbye? Did you think of any of us while you were gone? Think that maybe we wanted to know you were alive and safe?" He paused here but only to regain his breath, to gain more steam. "Or did you only think of yourself? Only think of your feelings and of your needs? Only think of how scared you felt, how nervous, how completely thrown bywhat we were building made you feel? Did you just think we'd forget you, that life would be okay for us, for me without you in it? Did you even miss us? Did you even miss me?"

She didn't interrupt him. She didn't try to explain herself, not yet. She'd known this was coming. Knew this needed to happen if they were going to have any chance of survival. She just stared at him, took in his haggard appearance. She noticed the slightly sunken eyes, the slight shadows under them. She noticed the way the lines on his face had grown a little deeper. He looked not unlike a prisoner just beginning to live again. Her heart tore a little more at the knowledge that she'd driven him to this point.

His hand on her shoulder startled her out of her daze. Too soon, far too soon it was gone, back with the body it belonged to. He was waiting for an answer, deep emerald eyes burning into her skin. But she'd lost the words, forgotten the question. She knew her words wouldn't be enough. Knew they wouldn't accurately explain why she'd left and why she'd returned. She needed more.

In the days to come they would remember the kiss. They would blush to remember the emotion behind it. Blush to remember the way she'd grabbed him and desperately pressed her lips to his. The way she'd used the kiss as a way to send him all her thoughts, memories and reams fro the past year. They would blush to remember how, as he'd began to make sense of the barrage of images and feelings and thoughts he was seeing, the kiss had lost the edge desperation and been replaced with understanding, acceptance, and forgiveness.

In the days to come they would smile to remember how, when they'd finally come up for air, she'd rested her head on his chest (when had he gotten so much taller?) and gaspingly told him how sorry she was, how stupid she was (although she would deny the stupid part) how much she'd missed him and how much she cared for him. He would smile as he gently teased her about the blush covering her cheeks as she'd explained how she'd been so afraid of what they forming. How she'd been so scared that what they were building was real and how she'd felt that she didn't deserve it, didn't deserve him. How she'd never meant to hurt him and about the dreams and the way sleep seemed to evade her every day she was away. Smiling slightly she'd tease him about the mature attitude he'd had when he told her that what they were building was real. That it would take work. Take time. Take patience. That those feelings were scary for him too and that he too was afraid that he didn't deserve what he was getting. But he was willing to go in headfirst, for the long haul with her. That he wanted her, all of her, everything she was willing to offer him because he loved her. In the days, weeks, and years to come they would smile to remember how she'd smiled, truly smiled and told him that she wanted all of him too, that she loved him too.

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A/N: So. There it is. I feel like it came off too cheesy, too unoriginal. Too much like a sappy romance movie or the Lifetime movie of the weekish. But I've been told more than once I'm too harsh on myself so I'll let you guys tell me what you think. Did I disappoint you with the ending? Was this a big letdown or did you enjoy it? Please let me know what you think. 


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